I used to think about and ponder what I’d be doing on this day, this week in this year. From a cruise to a trip to Europe; camping to a beach resort, I’d imagined many ways in which I’d spend my 25th wedding anniversary. Up until a couple of years ago, I’d never imagined spending it alone, the sole memory keeper of so much life.
It’s been 3 1/2 years since Thadd died and this date has been looming ever since. It’s silly, I know. It’s just a day. I should be glad to remember the 22 years we spent together and the 21 wedding anniversaries we shared. All the camping trips, hikes, house projects, game nights, and movie nights; the walks holding hands, snuggles on the couch, and road trips. Zoos, museums, historic sites; farmer’s markets, hardware stores, gun and car shows. Hashbrowns, homemade pizza, and chocolate chip cookies.
I do remember. And I am glad. I’m honored to carry those memories and to have shared that life. A life that began twenty-five years ago.
To be honest, I can hardly recall who that couple was – so much life has happened with so many changes and so much growth. The woman I was then seems but a faint shadow. Today, I’m just sad; missing all that hasn’t been, all that will never be, and the one I thought I’d be sharing it all with. So, I’m giving myself permission to be just that today – sad.
Create your memories. Love your loved ones. Don’t let things go unsaid or undone. Be intentional. #loveonpurpose and #liveyourfaithboldly.
If you’ve got 2.3 minutes, click to watch a video. I don’t know why this was our song (other than that we liked the sound of it), but it was, so I thought it was fitting to put with it.